Where Do I Stand?

It's been a while. Nearly one month ago I wrote a review for the iPhone 6 Plus. I had planned to do more after writing that review, but all the excitement I once had slipped through the cracks. I began to wonder if what I was doing was even worth it. I haven't been secretive about it; I have been wanting to make money from writing reviews about the video games I have played and the tech I have used. I have also been uploading video content onto YouTube since mid-August. Looking back, I was beginning to be desperate. I constantly tweeted links of my blogs and videos on Twitter. I made sure to post my new content on Tumblr. I was doing my best to use social media as an outlet for what I enjoy doing: playing video games and writing about them. I battled with myself to make it a priority rather than a hobby.

Having given it some thought I have come to realize that that thought process was a mistake. I see others with successful blogs and YouTube channels and began to wonder if I could ever compete with them. I'm not sure I can because I can't see myself making this a full-fledge priority. Rather than make it what I strictly do, I will go back to making this blog and my YouTube channel a hobby. If success comes, then great. If it doesn't come, then that's okay, too. I have been placing too much pressure on myself which hasn't garnered much fruit. Reviews and video content cannot come to fruition if I'm constantly bombarding myself with different games to play at the same time. Instead, I'll game like I used to game: for fun.

Recently I spoke with a friend about my gaming habits. I told him that as a child and teenager, I was a better gamer. He told me that he feels he is a better gamer now than he was growing up. I think the spark he has in regards to gaming was alive and well during my adolescent years. It has died down since that time. I even came to the point of selling all my gaming hardware and software because I felt I had lost that desire. It is still there, but I have come to see that there are more important things in my life than video games. I will continue to play them, but I doubt I will ever get back to how I was as a child.

Gaming will be a hobby. It may become a career someday, but for now it will be a hobby as I find what I can do to contribute to this world—what my identity is. That being said, I won't promise anything pertaining to new content on this blog and YouTube channel. If it comes, it comes. If it doesn't, then it doesn't. Right now, I have other things to take care of. New things will come, but they won't come as regularly as I would have liked them to. I've chosen to be okay with that. It wasn't an easy decision, but I am actually okay with that. It has relieved me of very unnecessary stress.

Let's see how long I take to write something new on my blog. Hopefully it doesn't take me another month to write something.